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TECHNOLOGY TAKEOVER TIME

In Uncategorized on May 21, 2015 at 4:21 pm

norman rockwell paintingby Vanessa Duersch

Early settlers to the American continent were not privileged to have the high quality telephones, paper printing methods, medicine, transportation, or even the fancy internet abilities to watch HD movies on Youtube. The best conveniences that they could speak for was the switchboard, horse and wagons, hand-sewn clothing, alcohol as a painkiller, and the printing press; just to project an overall image. We glance back at all the museums that seek to preserve and recreate what our ancestors had. No doubt that they may find themselves jealous at what conveniences we can enjoy today. No more days of harvesting, butchering, and trapping your own sustenance. There were many things that made life different than what it is today. Families had to work hard together to obtain so many things that technology has replaced for us today. It seems that while technology has come as a blessing in our lives to take care of us, it is hard to imagine that a quality of life was lost and forgotten with the changing culture of technological toys.

There is so much to learn from the elder family generations that led up to your existence. They may not have been the early pioneers, but they teach so much about how modern technology has boomed since they were growing up. When discussing how life differs to now, it becomes clear that they loved their lives of hard work and accomplishment and they were very sure of themselves on what the most important things in life were. Aunts, uncles and grandparents love telling their fascinating stories about being farmers during The Great Depression and how things were when they were lucky to have a radio. For them, that was enough for their childhood. Families worked hard and became closely bonded beyond what families seem to have today. After work, there was always playtime. They would play games like CAT, Annie Annie Over, Spoons or just go swim in the creek on a hot day. During the winter seasons, they would gather around a fire and read stories, listen to the radio, or just play music and dance. Couples would enjoy a nice walk and a picnic, or go on sleigh rides in the winter under a starry sky.  Everyone was involved and working together, bonding or reflecting on what is important to them-without the modern technologies squelching any chance of them shutting out one another.

You don’t have to throw out all modern technology and live in a cave for the rest of your life; but be able to know what your top priorities are in your life without the distractions of technology. Do your children know how to bake a sheet of cookies? Who is the best local family doctor when your kids get sick? Does your spouse know how to change the oil, change a diaper or soothe a crying baby? Do you know when your child is being bullied at school? How about what unique traits are hidden behind each special, strange, wonderful and quirky member of your family? What makes them happy? What makes them tick? How do they feel about their lives? Who are they? Do they know that you love them and think they are important to you? If you can’t answer the questions that show you care, then it is not too late to become your family’s hero. Get off the couch, turn off the smartphones, tvs and computers and take them somewhere beautiful, full of fresh air, water and trees. Be patient, and you might be amazed at what you learn.

Words from the Recently Engaged

In Uncategorized on May 20, 2015 at 8:18 am

happy couple 3by Tashica Jacobson

Two months ago I said “yes” to the biggest decisions of my life, and now both my fiancé and I are extremely happy. But with this one “yes” the wedding planning piñata blew up in my face, and now I’m wading through endless wedding planning, coordinating around everyone’s schedules, and counting down the days. There are many times, amid the stress, I have to stop and remind myself that this “yes” was also the start of us building our future family together and me personally living the things for which I’ve been advocating.

I’ve been told the benefits of marriage over and over again, and could list several of them, but as I look towards my own marriage things take on a different meaning. It’s not an accumulation of research papers any more, it’s life. I will be the one exemplifying what a marriage looks like for my friends and family, and what I accomplish with my marriage will influence many of them more than what anyone else will say.

When I review the progression of our relationship a study from the National Marriage Project comes to mind. They reported that premarital relationships influence marriage quality. In other words the patterns that a couple sets before marriage will continue to affect their relationship once married. One of the items listed is “sliding vs. deciding.” Sliding is when the development of a relationship happens without any real definite decisions. It may seem old fashion, but our relationship progressed with definite decisions. We have clear dates for the stages of our relationship. He announced his interest, we started officially dating, and we got engaged. Each step happened because we both decided to move to the next, the lines were not blurred.

All this has allowed me to look at the patterns that we have set for ourselves and what it is I hope to accomplish with our marriage. As we have started to make our plans I am realizing how important it is to be upfront with each other and create a strong foundation for the family we are going to have in the future.

A commitment to the community

One study discussed the importance of the wedding. Those with a larger public wedding report higher levels of marriage quality. While many factors play into this, one being that a public marriage shows a clear public commitment to one another. In The Case for Marriage, Maggie Gallagher argues that marriage is more than a private decision. She states “when you marry, the public commitment you make changes the way you think about yourself and your beloved; it changes the way you act and think about the future; and it changes how other people and other institutions treat you as well” (p. 43)

John Gottman’s quote “happy marriages are based on a deep friendship,” (p 19), makes me realize the foundation couples need to be developing. Friendship is what keeps couples together as they deal with the stress of daily challenges, and I like to think that this is what we have for each other and what we will continue to develop.  For example, he is the first person I want to tell when something silly happens at work. I find myself caring about things I never thought I would, simply because he cares about them. We were friends before we even started dating, and he’s someone I have always thought the world of.

The thing that I’m most in awe about is that this is the start of our own family. The other day I brought up a fear of having a child, and my concern that we get pregnant before we were planning for it. His response to this was, “That wouldn’t be a bad thing. I’m marrying you because I want to someday have a family with you, and if that happens sooner rather than later we will survive and it will be a good thing.” It is marvelous to see that as much as I love him now, I know that part of the love for him comes because I know we are going to grow together. Marriage is more than just the couple, it will extend for generations and the pattern that we establish now, will influence them.

It was once told to me that marriage was just doubling all of your problems, and that may be true. We are going to have to deal with my stubbornness and his forgetfulness; the fact I typically can’t stand movies, but he can name all the new releases for the year; his spending habits and my being a tight wad. We’re going to have to deal with groceries, insurance, children, health care, extended family, pets, dental visits, employment, and the lists goes on and on. But I wouldn’t want it any other way. I want to plan my life with someone who has just as much invested in those plans as I do.

Marriage is the basis for everything that I care about and advocate for, and now it’s becoming real for me. While I realize that I’m naive when it comes to the challenges and problems that we are going to face, I know that it is all going to be worth it; and that marriage will make us better, just as it makes society better.

References:

Gallagher, M., & Waite, L. J. (2000). The case for marriage. New York, NY: Broadway Books.

Gottman, J. M., & Silver, N. (1999). The seven principles for making marriage work. New York, NY: Three Rivers Press.

Rhoades, G. K., & Stanley, S. M. (2014) Before I do: what do premarital experiences have to do with marital quality among today’s young adults. The National Marriage Project.

The Best Moral Code!

In Uncategorized on May 19, 2015 at 7:42 am

Dennis PragerThe following is an interview with Dennis Prager, a nationally syndicated radio talk show host, columnist, author, conductor, and public speaker. His insights on the importance of living our lives by the Ten Commandments makes this well worth the read…

http://ldsmag.com/dennis-prager-why-the-10-commandments-are-still-the-best-moral-code/

How Honest Are You?

In Uncategorized on May 18, 2015 at 8:44 am
mother and daughter talkingby Rebecca Mallory
 “Honesty is the best policy” is a famous proverb written by Benjamin Franklin. Even Wikipedia says that “Honesty refers to a facet of moral character and connotes positive and virtuous attributes such as integrity, truthfulness, and straightforwardness, including straightforwardness of conduct, along with the absence of lying, cheating, theft, etc.” Furthermore, honesty means being trustworthy, loyal, fair.” It’s so much easier to just be honest in the first place rather than having to back track, recall what you said to whom in what situation, and then possibly get caught anyway. People don’t trust you then.  Trust is very fragile and fickle and hard to regain.
If this is true, why do we see such a void of honesty today? Perhaps because often, honesty is the hardest policy. We’ve all heard stories, or experienced ourselves, being caught in a web of deceit or lies that made us feel uncomfortable or got us in even bigger trouble. What’s the big deal with honesty? In today’s world where so many high-profile celebrities and politicians are anything but honest, how do we protect our children and teach them right from wrong?
Back in the 50’s and 60’s, children were taught right and wrong which was then reinforced at church and at school. Children were punished for treating each other unkindly, taking things that were not their own, or punished for cheating on tests and other assignments. Fast forward to today where churches are losing members because of the persecution of religious beliefs and dishonesty is often rewarded or ignored because “we don’t want to hurt someone’s feelings or single them out by embarrassing them.” This is a destructive and backward policy. People, old and young, need to be held accountable for their actions. Embarrassment and shame are natural consequences of bad behavior. That’s how they learn, that’s how they progress and become valuable members of a successful and well-functioning society. Everyone makes mistakes but we need to learn from those mistakes, however painful. Honesty should be a basic principle that parents and teachers revere and hold in high priority. If you love your children, teach them honesty. Today’s public schools have reverted from teaching values and morals. Ridiculous. It makes no sense to me.
I recently read a story about a large family growing up in the mid-west. They had little money. The father, in order to keep his children safe in the yard, strung a large rope around the perimeter and made each child promise that they would not cross that rope for any reason without permission, which they all did. One day they were playing with a ball which flew over that rope and landed well beyond. Later, their uncle came to visit and saw the children lined up looking longingly at that ball. They had never considered breaking their promise to their father to retrieve the ball. Their uncle was impressed to say the least!

What would you have done? What would I have done? After all, either you’re honest, or your not. There is no in between. It is sobering when you look at it as a black and white issue especially in a society where “50 shades of grey” is the disappointing norm. Seemingly small stories like this one absolutely pale in comparison to the horrific displays of criminal dishonesty that we have all witnessed from NFL stars and politicians vying for the nation’s top office. “Winning at all cost” is cried from the rooftops of almost all venues. It doesn’t matter if you cheat, lie, steal, or even cause pain or death to others as long as you win and, of course, have a great team of lawyers who can get you off just in case you get caught.

We all watched in horror at the events in Ferguson, MO, and Baltimore as criminals were allowed and almost encouraged to loot and destroy property because of their supposed disadvantaged lot in life. What a horrible way to treat people! To expect despicable behavior from anyone should be condemned by every living person. Why not do our best to lift them up and give them hope and encouragement? Expect honesty! Yet the “go to” band-aid is to throw more money at impoverished communities. Here again, dishonesty prevails as much of these funds never make it to the streets to help those who need it most. Google for yourself where the billions of dollars that we’re allocated to Baltimore from the stimulus in 2008 actually ended up.
It’s criminal.
So here’s your only chance for survival, America. Be honest in all you do. If you see that the paper towels at the bottom of your grocery cart were not paid for, take your children back in to the store and let them watch you pay for it. If not, you’re stealing it. (Plus the look on the clerk’s face will be priceless!) Teach your children to be honest in everything they do. Teaching by example is a most powerful tool, as they watch and mimic your every move. The temptation to take the easy road of cheating, lying, and stealing is alluring. Especially when they see celebrities and even their own peers getting away with it. Teach them that what’s even more alluring is being respected and revered by all because they can be trusted. Just weigh the results of each.  Which will help them most in the long run? Our world is starving for honest and forthright men and women. Let’s you and I be those people. Let’s consciously raise the next generation to rise above a dishonest and depraved society. Hey! I guess honesty is the best policy!

Could the Supreme Court End Religious Freedom

In Uncategorized on May 15, 2015 at 10:31 am

supreme court in rainbow colorsby Gary Boyd

For many years, large numbers of Christians have put their religious belief to work through countless humanitarian projects at home as well as abroad. Though believers in Christianity, they have, to this point, taken the role of pacifism in the culture war.

John Inazu, associate professor of law and political science at Washington University School of Law, opines that Christians who have involved themselves in good works, but have not taken a clear stand on societal issues that effect religious freedom, may well be pulled into the fight. The catalyzing event would be the Supreme Court’s anticipated June ruling on same-sex marriage, depending both on the decision, and how the decision is written.

Douglas Laycock, a law professor at the University of Virginia, while arguing in favor of same-sex marriage, also expressed concern in an amicus brief to the Supreme Court about the ramifications that would certainly surface if the Supreme Court rules in favor of same-sex marriage in all 50 states. The broad effect would leave no aspect of daily business involving Christian nonprofits and church’s untouched. Mr. Laycock’s brief makes concise summary of the potential situation:

Must pastors, priests, and rabbis provide religious marriage counseling to same-sex couples? Must religious colleges provide married student housing to same-sex couples? Must churches and synagogues employ spouses in same-sex marriages, even though such employees would be persistently and publicly flouting the religious teachings they would be hired to promote? Must religious organizations provide spousal fringe benefits to the same-sex spouses of any such employees they do hire? Must religious social-service agencies place children for adoption with same-sex couples? Already, Catholic Charities in Illinois, Massachusetts, and the District of Columbia have closed their adoption units because of this issue.

“Religious colleges, summer camps, day care centers, retreat houses, counseling centers, meeting halls, and adoption agencies may be sued under public accommodations laws for refusing to offer their facilities or services to same-sex couples. Or they may be penalized by loss of licensing, accreditation, government contracts, access to public facilities, or tax exemption.

While June is still a month away, and no decision has yet been made, those concerned about religious freedom should be concerned, particularly organizations that could potentially be sued out of existence, and should start considering what services they will still continue to provide, and what measures they will take to maintain the integrity between their beliefs and practices.

Free Speech no More

In Uncategorized on May 13, 2015 at 6:20 am

First Amendment on Trialby Diane Robertson

Two hundred forty years ago, there were tens of thousands ready to give their very lives for freedom. With God on their side, and a sacrifice of blood, they were able to bring freedom to the world. Today on the very land hallowed by their sacrifice, millions upon millions of people cower at being called names, and those freedoms that men bled and died for will be taken away without a single shot fired.

On May 9th, Alliance Defending Freedom, posted a warning to the American people on their Facebook page. They wrote:

“Americans need to prepare for the same sort of surveillance-society if the Supreme Court rules to ban marriage as a male-female institution. It means that no matter what you believe, the government will be free to regulate your speech, your writing, your associations, and whether or not you may express your conscience.

Americans also need to understand that the endgame for some in the LGBT rights movement involves centralized state power—and the end of First Amendment freedoms.”

This prefaced an article making its way around the web. Canadian citizen, Dawn Stefanowicz, wrote about the changes gay marriage has initially made in the Canadian government and society. She wrote it as a warning to the American people who may be facing a sweeping ruling from the US Supreme Court ordering the nation to legalize gay marriage. I summarized this in an earlier article titled: 3 Ways Gay Marriage Has Changed Canada. Since gay marriage became legalized in Canada, the citizens can no longer speak freely about homosexuality without legal consequences. They may no longer write blogs, newspaper articles, or anything that speaks against gay marriage, homosexuality, or the laws governing marriage and family. Parental rights are trampled upon and the government justifies intervening in how parents teach their children about religion and sexuality. Churches are loosely monitored for any public teachings that include the common religious beliefs on homosexuality and marriage. Canada is now under a surveillance-society. There is no right to conscience and there is no freedom that allows Canadian citizens to disagree with gay marriage or homosexuality.

To keep the United States government from ever making laws that would trample upon the natural rights of the people and destroy all that the soldiers fought for in the Revelutionary War, James Madison penned these words:

“Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the government for a redress of grievances.”

After more than two hundred years of freedoms guaranteed by the sacrifice of blood given freely by our founding fathers, we have come to a point where these freedoms may be done away. And why? Because too many people, too many American citizens, cowered and watched silently, as they eroded. Guns did not need to be pointed, too many have given up their freedom simply because they could not stand up against words.

The Power of Marital Intimacy

In Uncategorized on May 12, 2015 at 8:41 am

feet in bedby Nathalie Bowman

Sexual intimacy in marriage has the potential to make or break a relationship. For many married couples, sexual intimacy takes a back burner to children, work, and all the demands of the modern lifestyle. However, if taken seriously and given conscientious effort, marital intimacy can be a couple’s greatest asset towards their marriage fulfillment.

Although there may be a few lucky couples who have never had issues with intimacy in marriage, it is common to experience difficulties in the bedroom. There are as many reasons for this as there are struggling couples, but there are some common issues that many couples experience: lack of communication about intimacy, not knowing what to expect, fear, emotional or physical pain, and misunderstanding. In some circumstances (and from my experience working with clients, it’s not uncommon), negative childhood experiences such as abuse, shame, neglect, or even parental divorce, can contribute to negative sexual experiences within marriage.

Sexual fulfillment within marriage is the greatest opportunity to strengthen marriage on all levels. It takes a conscious effort of openness and communication to create a satisfying sexual relationship within marriage, and it is worth every bit of that effort. Not only is intimacy much more fun and fulfilling, but it’s amazing what happens to the marriage relationship in all other aspects as well. As our intimate relationship has improved over the years, my husband and I have found that there is more mutual respect, more willingness to forgive, more physical touch, more fun, more understanding, and greater enjoyment of just being in one another’s company. Mutually fulfilling marital intimacy has the potential to change and even heal marriages on all levels.

Marriage intimacy expert Laura Brotherson gives an interesting view in her article, “When Husband’s Aren’t Interested”. Although many times women struggle with gearing up for sexual activity within marriage, Laura discusses how to help men who struggle:

“One woman had an “ah-ha” moment one night regarding the dynamics of sexual desire in her marriage. She wrote the following:

“I remember one evening seeing in my husband’s eyes that he was not exactly in the mood.’ The cares of the day and the weight of work pressures were heavy on his mind, not to mention the fact that he was just plain tired. All of a sudden it dawned on me that I was seeing my husband the way he usually sees me, in a ‘not-interested-in-sex’ state of mind.

It was a strange sensation to be on the other side of the coin, because I was interested in sex that night. To imagine my husband not being automatically interested in lovemaking was a new concept.”

Men Need Foreplay Too

Given the many stressors of life and especially as husbands age, men may need a little more foreplay too. Foreplay is something that helps relax and prepare the mind and body for sex.

Sometimes women like to think that they have the corner on the market when it comes to needing some help to shift from daily cares to more sensual activities.

But men, too, like to be touched and kissed and caressed both verbally and physically. As we can see from the scenario above, it was the husband who particularly needed some connecting foreplay to get him headed in a more sensual direction.

We sometimes forget that it isn’t just women who long for connection and want to feel loved, appreciated and wanted. And don’t think that men don’t also need the same courtesies outside the bedroom and throughout the day that women do.

Couples may need to be a little more intentional with their lovemaking and understand that sex does begin at breakfast for both husband and wife.

When the Husband’s Not Interested……Read more

I’m Sorry; I Just Never Learned How to Fail

In Uncategorized on May 11, 2015 at 9:03 am

child discouragedby Kelsi Shipley

It’s loud and cold, but you don’t notice. Your son is playing in the state football championship game. He has worked relentlessly to be ready for this game. He’s been hitting the gym, attending practices, and has even missed hanging out with friends to be ready for tonight.

You know how much he wants to win, and he’s not the only one who has put effort into this game. You have taken him to practices, watched every game, and have been his support system since he was a small boy. You have literally seen the blood, sweat, and tears.

It’s the end of the game, and the other team is ahead by one touch down. Your team has the ball. The quarterback makes an exceptional pass. Your son is standing in the end zone. He jumps! You and the rest of the crowd simultaneously jump to your feet with him.

He’s going to catch it! Your son is about to be a small town hero! His hard work is about to pay off!

You see the ball spiraling towards him. He’s made this catch a million times. You can’t wait to see the excitement on his face. The ball goes right into his hands, but something happens.

He can’t quite seem to grab it. He drops the ball. The crowd goes silent. That’s the end of the game.

Now what? What do you say to him later tonight? Your son gave this game everything he had, and didn’t win. He will probably feel like he “failed.”

Failure is an interesting concept. In our society everyone gets a trophy, a participation medal, or a certificate. No one fails. No one looses. It’s what we consider to be fair. Is it fair to teach children that they won’t fail?

We go to great lengths to protect our children from failing. We don’t want their feelings to be hurt. We don’t want them to feel disappointed. We even sometimes go out of our way to blame others for our children’s failures. Why?

Teaching your child how to fail, and that it is okay to do so, is one of the kindest lessons you can teach them. Life is not fair. They will not always make the team, they will not always get the girl, and they will not always get their dream job. However, they will be okay.

As a society, we are so engrained in improving self-esteem; we are forgetting to teach how to cope with disappointments.

We can teach children how to cope with failure while also helping improve their self-esteem. Children, just like adults, feel more validated when they earn what they have worked for. Children can be taught how to handle failure, and how to motivate themselves afterwards.

The following are suggestions on how to do this:

Be a guide. It is important to remember that your child will have heartache’s when you are not around. Children need to be asked how they think they can solve their own problems. Allowing them to come up with their own solutions gives them a sense of control.

Children are smarter than we sometimes think. They can solve their own problems, but they may need your help and guidance. They will feel empowered when they make their own decisions.

 Avoid setting unrealistic expectations. If your child is struggling in a subject at school, encourage them to strive for a goal that is within reach. After they have reached that goal, encourage them to work harder. Your child will feel successful as they accomplish reasonable goals.

Be a good role model for your child. When you fail, allow your children to see you do so. Let them see how you handle the situation. Talk through it with them. Let them see that you are hopeful, even after failing.

You know your child better than anyone else. You know what will motivate them, and what will disappoint them. I am not suggesting that you allow your children to put themselves in a position where they could be seriously hurt. I am suggesting that as adults, parents, and teachers we look for ways children can learn how to fail safely.

When children fail in a safe environment, they are more prepared for failures elsewhere. They will know that they can move forward. Children do not stay young forever, and their disappointments in life will only become harder.

Let us teach our children that there is life after failures. Let us teach them that they can pick themselves up when they get knocked down. Let us be kind, and teach our children how to handle failure with dignity and hope.

Modern Academic Oppression

In Uncategorized on May 7, 2015 at 10:08 pm

proffessorby Gary Boyd

Many students across America  on probably every college campus, have wondered whether they might have received lesser grades than they felt they deserved; not due to their academic performance, but due to controversial views expressed by students over the duration of a college course. Many college courses tend toward ideological conflict, and, unavoidably, strong, differing opinions are held by students. Some of those opinions will be consistent with the points of view espoused by instructors, and some will not.

The conflicted environment described above inherently makes for instructor favoritism of students who share, or at least pretend to share, an instructor’s view of the contested subject. I once found myself in the midst of a college class dealing with, what was at the time, an explosive issue. I asked the instructor after the first day of class if it may not be advisable for me to drop the class, as it was clear we were on opposite sides of debate. I was told that my performance would be judged based on my ability to support my arguments with research, and not on my agreement or disagreement with his views. Much to my instructor’s credit, though we spent the entire semester in opposition, he still awarded me an A in the class, and we became friends, even getting together once outside of class.

A student referred to only as G.L. in an article by Kaitlyn Schallhorn, experienced something far beyond a slight bias based on her views. In a humanities class that dealt in part with Christianity, its history, and its values, G.L. was made to answer questions designed in a manner that any response to them would be a denial of her faith and belief.

G.L. received a zero on four papers, because she would not provide a conventional answer to the questions on which the papers were based.

Two items in the case of G.L. require attention.

First, in contrast to my own experience, where a potential for instructor bias existed, and which might have been a problem with a lesser instructor, whether the bias might have been consciously or subconsciously asserted, G.L.’s experience has been one where a college instructor has attempted to dictate to the students their beliefs within parameters set by him.

Second, G.L’s experience is not necessarily a bad thing for society. Instructor bias has not been widely addressed on an institutional level within most colleges and universities. Such a brazen abuse of classroom control on the part of the professor may send a message to administrators, at least, hopefully, to the administrators at Polk State College where G.L. attends, that religious tolerance running in all direction needs to be insured for patrons of their institution.

Why You Should Be a Consultant Parent

In Uncategorized on May 7, 2015 at 10:31 am

parenting-teensBy: Kristen Jan Cannon

Do you ever think about how your parents raised you? What do you appreciate about them? What would you absolutely do differently?

How much has your life course been influenced due to your parents’ parenting style?

And how are you going to parent your children?

Because surprisingly enough, becoming a parent doesn’t automatically make you an expert at raising children. No offense to all you parents out there who are doing your best in this extremely difficult feat! But good intentions aside, one of the most common things parents lack overall is an education in parenting and child guidance.

So let’s talk about effective parenting, and more importantly, why it is effective parenting.

Jim Fay, author of “Love and Logic”, has defined three different parenting styles: consultant parenting, helicopter parenting, and drill sergeant parenting.

While each style has its’ strengths and weaknesses, one of these approaches is much more effective than the others.

Fay’s term “consultant” is also interchangeable with another popular parenting term in the realm of social science known as “authoritative.” According to Fay, as well as countless experts, being a consultant parent is the most effective approach to child rearing.

But why?

In the consultant, or authoritative version of parenting, parents allow children to make choices within reasonable limits. This approach allows children to seek counsel and guidance from their parents, while still maintaining accountability for their own actions.

This not only produces happier children, but more capable children. Consultant parenting creates an atmosphere that encourages natural consequences, personal achievement, and a healthy self-esteem.

Parents who tend to use a drill sergeant or helicopter approach are not facilitating a path that allows their children to develop autonomy, independence, and responsibility. In fact, both of these methods produce a low sense of self worth in children and diminish overall success in all aspects of development.

So maybe before you continue with habits that you use “because your parents used them”, realize the impact that you have on your children’s growth and development.

Parenting is kind of a big deal. So get informed.

Here are three, highly recommended parenting philosophies to check out:

Love and Logic by: Jim Fay

Unconditional Parenting by: Alfie Kohn

Emotion Coaching by: John Gottmann

Happy parenting!

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